Prof Quotes F04

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Prof Quotes F04

Frank Morgan

Assuming that these pieces of paper are open, I'm creating an open cover of the table.

All that your modern real analysis robot can say is "open sets."

If someone is fat but very very tall, is that person fat? No.

The devil's advocate helps even the angels.

There are more people every year, but in the limit, there aren't any!

The World Series is not a series -- it's a sequence.

Dick De Veaux

People have sex -- I think that's a fair statement.

If you can be an outlier in the log scale, that's impressive.

I would never do this in Stat 101, especially before drop/add.

This is America. More is always better.

Statisticians like to talk about the magic land of asymptopia where everything finally achieves its limit.

If I say "stop raining" long enough, it will stop raining and I'll think I have control.

Most drawers I've seen have a finite number of socks.

A quarter trillion here, a quarter trillion there, and pretty soon you're talking real money.

You can check it to a million decimal places, and that's probably close enough for any work you'll do.

You can't prove a math theorem like that, but you can get paid.

This is science here! Don't eat the lab animals!

E.J. Johnson

[on the Venus de Milo:] In terms of modern beauty, you probably think, she's a little heavy. She should go to Curves.

[on the Snake Goddess Barbie:] If there is a stomach in there at all, it can hold two grapes and a lettuce leaf.

[ibid.] She could never bear children -- there would be no room in her abdomen for a baby along with the grapes and the lettuce leaf.

[ibid.] She has a body so thin it can only be maintained on a regular diet of heroin.

[on the Clark:] We will meet in the lobby of the purple granite fortress.

Mussolini was a dreadful little man.

Roman emperors turned themselves into gods with some abandon, as we will see.

This star looks like something your third grade teacher would have given you when you were very very good.

[on Brooks-Rogers:] This room is not a store in which to buy lettuce.

Architects and curators are natural enemies, like the mongoose and the cobra.

Your feet will turn purple, your teeth will chatter, and you might die, so please dress accordingly.

Kris Kirby

Even if you go to grad school, you will never again find a correlation this big. Remember this day.