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Thanks to P
Celebrating 25 Years
Of PEAGXC
The runners remember...
"You make the team. I just do the same thing every year."
-Coach Parris, fall 2002
Well, I am probably one of the oldest members of the PEA Girls Cross Country Team to write about Rick Parris. I ran for the team in 1979, the first year for girls' cross country at Exeter. It was my first year away from home (I spent only my senior year at Exeter). I remember feeling like we were a little family. One of my fondest memories was when Rick and Pam Parris brought all of us into their home (apartment I believe it was) and shared with us a spaghetti supper the night before a race. Pam was pregnant with her first child. I do remember fondly Rick playing the harpsichord, and also tutoring me in math, as I was struggling with calculus. Pam was always there with her bright smile and words of encouragement for all of us.
Dear Rick,
Mr. Parris was a great coach, partially because he found useful calories in our teenage distractions. In everything I have been fortunate enough to experience since running with the girls' cross country team, I have been lucky enough to learn and teach simultaneously, kind of like breathing, kind of like running up one of those pothole-riddled hills. It is a mundane thing and so very great, vital, like breathing. Mr. Parris always helped me find the best in me.
I remember how Mr. Parris' license plate, PEAGXC, always lifted my spirits because it showed his total devotion to the team. He might remember me because I completely lacked athletic ability. My running career started when I was placed on the track team after failing to duck during club baseball. On my first day of track practice I fell flat on my face and Mr. Parris ended up jogging back with me to the Sports Centre, with blood trickling out of my mouth. In my second year of cross-country I lettered, but under highly unusual circumstances: Most of the team's Jewish members decided not run at a meet on Yom Kippur, making me the fifth fastest PEAGXC runner that day by default. In my senior year I developed exercise-induced asthma and gave up competitive running. The great thing about Mr. Parris is that he always treated me as a valuable member of the team. He told my parents once that I was important because I inspired the other runners to work harder. Without his encouragement, though, I probably would have given up on running.
Even before the fall of 1979, when I entered Exeter as a prep, I knew of Mr. Parris and that I wanted to compete on the girls cross-country team. With the help of my older brother Ted (also an Exeter student), Mr. Parris and I sought one another out and helped prepare for the fall season. Mr. Parris helped me to realize a very successful season, and he was a constant of calm and rational thought in the face of my nerves over racing and adjusting to the school. He promoted comraderie and cooperation among team members and was always fair and creative in his workouts. I can still vividly picture certain pieces of those runs--along the beach in Rye, the hill workout, the middle and last stretches of the school's course, and the early hill in the course at the Interschols at Northfield-Mount Hermon. Indeed, these are among my clearest memories of Exeter.
I joined the cross country team in the Fall of 1982 as somewhat of an accident. Until that time (I was a 17-year-old senior) I had never voluntarily participated in any sporting activity at all. So how did I join a competitive team? My friend Suzi Lee convinced me to do it with her and somehow I heard what later turned out to be an erroneous rumor that we'd all get letters. Well, about two weeks into the season, Suzi sprained her ankle and was out for the duration--but joining the cross country team turned out to be a wonderful experience despite initial setbacks. Mr. Parris infused the team with his soft-spoken encouragement and really helped create an atmosphere of comraderie. I loved being part of the team--although we were each on our own in many ways when we were running, we would meet as a group and he made us all feel part of a team.
I ran cross country my senior year. Mr. Parris was an inspiring coach-I was not much of a runner but he got me doing 11 miles without too much complaining. He was very patient, gave a lot of encouragement and was dedicated to the team.
When I was at Exeter (1982-84), I was a troubled, immature and undisciplined young girl. I can't imagine that Coach Parris would even remember me. I ran cross-country, sort of. I was actually a decent sprinter and ice hockey player and participated in cross-country as a way of "staying in shape" when I wasn't playing ice hockey or running track. I was a smoker! I really didn't have the desire or discipline to run any distance longer than about 400 meters. I also had a nagging ankle injury that required two surgeries during college. I think I only ever completed one cross-country race in competition, and probably I walked a lot of the distance. At practice, if I did anything Coach Parris asked, I surely complained about it bitterly. I simply could not understand how anyone in their right mind could enjoy running long distances.
Oh my goodness, where to start? When it comes to Rick, I can't say enough. He was, to me, one of the most important people when I was a student at PEA, largely because he went beyond being just a cross country coach (and also math teacher). He provided a receptive ear when I was distraught regarding family things, tortured by some mathematical theorem, or unsure of my own academic or athletic capabilities. At cross country practice, he always accompanied the team, sometimes using the training runs to exhort us to develop goals and consistency-- and sometimes to simply share stories which would inspire us to perform as best we could, whatever the situation, be it racing or "just" living life. I was a captain of the team, and I was proud to uphold Rick's team-values and comportment because he was so decent about everything. He did not always agree with everything his charges said or did, but he approached matters with the kindness and clear vision of a sensitive mentor and I feel all of us highly enjoyed his company.
When I look back on the four seasons I spent running on Coach Parris' cross country teams, I remember how much fun he made our practices. At times, I had so much fun that I forgot how hard I was training. He often took us to scenic locales in the van for our practices, including Rye Beach, Apple Annie's orchard, and countless other beautiful routes. I also remember how welcoming Coach Parris and his wife were to the team, hosting crepe parties at their house, and inviting the team to their house to watch the Boston Marathon together. I also remember how much he personalized his coaching, ensuring that he spent time with each of us to enable us to become better runners. He inspired in me a love of running that I carry with me to this day.
One of my fondest memories of Exeter is participating each fall in the girls cross-country team. Through daily workouts and weekend competitions, Mr. Parris provided me with an opportunity to explore the New Hampshire countryside and to grow and challenge myself outside of the classroom. I vividly remember Mr. Parris driving us to orchards across the granite state, where my teammates and I completed long runs through apple country. After the workouts, Mr. Parris bought us cider and donuts from the local orchard.
As I think back to my four years at Exeter, the experience of running cross-country is among my very brightest and fondest memories. I distinctly remember how each day, no matter how late I had stayed up the night before, how stressed out I was, or how bad my day had been, an extraordinary sense of relief and feeling of calm would pour over me as I sat stretching in the grass with my fellow teammates and our beloved Mr. Parris. Mr. Parris welcomed each of us to the team, never judgmental and always affirming. He had a quiet way of building our confidence and nurturing our abilities that I have rarely known. He seemed to know how much we needed, beyond physical exercise, a space of comfort and camaraderie, where we could free ourselves from academic pressures. I laugh when I think about the immense joy we all felt in piling into a van to head for the woods or the beach or Apple Annie's orchard. There was something exhilarating and even somewhat transgressive about getting away from campus like that, escaping, seeing glimpses of all those otherwise invisible worlds that surrounded our regular campus existence. Though I'm sure there were times when I dreaded the run, there was absolutely nothing better than the feeling of running free on country roads, or arriving at the beach and plunging our sore feet into the water.
Mr. Parris may not remember me, but I have fond memories of my time at Exeter, especially running cross-country. I spent a Post-Graduate year at Exeter during the school year of 1986-1987 after having been graduated from Hartford High School in White River Junction, Vermont. I had loved running cross-country and track in Vermont and only loved it more when I arrived at Exeter. Mr. Parris often used innovative techniques and unusual off-campus practice locations for the runners on his teams, which made cross-country special and fun. I remember running at Apple Annie's apple orchard and finishing practice with the reward of delicious apples to take back to the dorm on a crisp, sunny autumn day. I remember riding in the van to a location three or four miles from the beach in Hampton or somewhere thereabouts, running from there to the beach and delighting in the feeling of the cold salt water on my tired feet when I finished at the ocean. It was like a mini vacation from the pressures of academics to participate in these special outings and it was thoughtful and resourceful of Mr. Parris to make the extra effort to arrange for us to have chances to run away for a little while each week; it made the Exeter experience even more fun and memorable.
Dear Coach Parris:
Dear Mr. Parris,
I loved cross-country at Exeter. I'd never before had a coach who brought us to so many different places for so many different types of runs. The visits to the apple orchard and the beach, even the dreaded hill runs, were such a nice refuge from the daily grind. The camaraderie and team spirit was wonderful, and largely due to his influence. I'm sorry to hear he's retiring, and can only hope that the next coach will be half as good.
I graduated in the class of 1988 and ran all three years I attended. (I hope the school has improved on those fashion reject uniforms we had back then!) Mr. Parris had the right personality to lead a gangly group of teen girls through the New England back roads. I still can't imagine how he did it without going nuts. Definitely an even-keeled guy.
I ran cross country for three years at Exeter and was co-captain of the team during my senior year (1988-1989). I remember the first day of practice--I was nervous and unsure if I should join the team, and if I did, whether I could really do it. Upon meeting Mr. Parris, all doubts dissipated. He was so nice, and I could tell that running with the team was going to make Exeter tolerable.
Cross Country was the first sport I "played" at Exeter--Prep Fall found me traversing the NH countryside with close friends, following the maps and arrows that Coach Parris wrote on the ground in chalk. On gorgeous days, the maps were easy to read and the runs were lots of fun. But as a "fair-weather jogger" prior to PEA, let's just say that on rainy days, the maps were tough to read and the runs were tough to take.
I fondly remember cross country and indoor track with Daddy-long-legs. I was not, however, too found of long runs followed by math class! There is one particular workout that I remember like it was yesterday, racing Mr. Parris to the top of Shaw's Hill - repeatedly. My favorite workouts were always the short and sweet ones. Whenever I return to campus there are a set of faculty I hope to connect with and Mr. Parris is on that list. Not because I was an athlete who contributed to his winning seasons, because I didn't; or because I was that great math student, because I surely was not; but because he cares about each of us and keeps track of each of us as we move away from PEA. He connects with students in a variety of ways, and I was one of the lucky ones who were able to run with him.
Dear Mr. Parris,
Cross-country practices with Mr. Parris were among some of my happiest moments at Exeter. I loved the field trips, the whole team piling into the red PEA vans for long runs off-campus. Each of these practices was a new adventure, a chance to escape the usual routine and run along quiet, leafy country roads (and occasional cow paths) in Exeter's surrounding communities. I loved the trips to Apple Annie's and Applecrest, where, at the end of the run, Mr. Parris would be waiting with apple cider--and maybe an oatmeal raisin cookie.
Congratulations on your “long run” as head coach of the cross-country team. You were a great coach and I often think of you and my teammates as I run along the paths near my home.
Mr. Parris,
Mr. Parris,
Both in the classroom and on the roads and trails, Mr. Parris would motivate me with very few words. The most powerful were, "She's one of my runners." A runner I was not, but it was his quiet enthusiasm that encouraged someone like me, who had never run before, to run and to keep running as an adult. Mr. Parris never pressured me to be faster. He just encouraged me to keep going and to be a little better each time. He would tell us to run out and back. He would tell me not to worry about how far I went, but to go as far as I could in the time I had. I remember that even today. It's advice that transcends running. He also made running fun, with adventures on different trails and rewards like apple cider. And he always said that if I couldn't talk to the person next to me while I ran, then I was running too fast. He made running a buddy sport, which I never expected. Thank you, Mr. Parris, for giving me the desire to continue to run my best, however slowly, with my buddies.
I remember Mr. P as being a great motivator. Even though I was always at the back of the pack, he encouraged me to strive to run harder and lengthen my stride. I loved the runs that took us off campus onto New Hampshire country roads. The fall colors were beautiful and the runs often ended at an apple orchard. Mr. P would have a jug of apple cider in hand to offer as a treat to all the runners. He and his family graciously invited us to dinner in their home every season--the only faculty member I can recall having me for dinner at their house. It was a special treat to a Southern girl who missed the warmth of home and family.
My time with cross country at Exeter was extremely meaningful and lots of memories come to mind. Probably the most vivid involve "P" with his santa hat on and his red tights with his little skinny legs hopping around (usually becuase it was so cold) and loading us all into the van for a trip out somewhere in the NH countryside. I also think of him running up and down the road beside us on training runs, attempting to talk to all of us in turn. I also remember his cozy house where we would all gather for dinner on occasion for meet prep or just friendship. Mr. P was a relatively quiet but steadfast motivator who said little but was always there in the background offering strong support. He will be missed on future teams but for 25 years he certainly did his part!
A tribute to "Mr. P"
It is without hesitation that I say that Mr. Parris is my favorite teacher at Exeter. I was fortunate not only to have him as my cross country coach but also to have him as a math instructor. There are so many positive memories from Cross Country. The one that struck me the most deeply was one day when we were running quarter mile sprints. At the start of the loop, Mr. Parris patted me confidently on the back and said, "Ana, you're going to lead the group on this quarter." I was certainly not the fastest runner on the team but for that one quarter-mile sprint, I finished yards ahead of the other girls, earning my fastest time yet. His ability to use positive, mental reinforcement increased my confidence and made me a better runner.
Dear Mr. Parris,
When I think of my 4 years at Exeter, I am most thankful for my time with the cross country team. Exeter was a tough experience, but with cross country running as an outlet, I was able to achieve, relax, unwind, and blow off steam. I was able to find a niche there, where it didn't matter where you were from, how much money your family had, what grades you made, but only that you were part of a team, present every day for those exhilarating practices. Sometimes they seemed like torture, but finishing gave me such joy and I am so thankful for the ability take part!
The most wonderful thing about Mr. P is that he made us a team. Saturdays and Wednesdays (easy days if there was no meet) we would all meet up together without Mr. P (who usually had a faculty meeting). To show him we were all running as we were supposed to, we would run past the math department window and jump up and wave as roll-call.
P, Thank you so much for everything at Exeter! You didn't just teach me how to run; you taught me the best stress-busting technique ever! I still run regularly and am a happier and healthier person for it. I did you proud in the Nike 10k last year and although I didn't get a place in the London Marathon for this April, I'm hoping to run for a charity next year! I'll always remember getting the "Chariots of Fire" truck stuck on the beach!
Dear P-
P, I will never forget all the fond memories of PEA cross-country--running all over southern New Hampshire, racing in Interschols, eating team pasta dinners at your house, falling over in the sock workout, dancing in the rain and mud... Thanks for being an awesome coach, friend, and teacher.
P, I decided to run cross country my senior year after hearing stories for three years from happy Lamontsters about how great it was to have you as a coach. Everything they said was right. Thank you for making me, and other not-as-fast girls like me, want to get out on the course and run our own best races.
I would just like to say how much I appreciated P's and Mrs. P's kindness. For me P embodies the greatest aspects of going to Exeter. Whenever I tell my friends how wonderful Exeter was I always end up telling some story about how I went to P's house and ate crepes and pasta and bonded with the whole team before a cross country race. To be honest, I was probably the worst runner cross country has ever known! But I stayed on the team and LOVED IT because I felt like I was part of a big, supportive family.
Dear P,
P, I had oatmeal for breakfast this morning and immediately thought of you. I remember coming to your house every Wednesday morning and eating oatmeal with four or five other girls on the team. I often felt a long way from home while I was at Exeter. However, talking with you over breakfast always made me feel as if I had a father at Exeter.
I think one of the most remarkable things about Mr. P as a coach was how he made all that he did for us seem so unremarkable at the time. Every week we all got PEAGXC letters in our P.O. boxes, outlining the upcoming practice schedule. Most days we would head off in a red van to good training sites in the area and, when we got back on after the workout, there’d be a cooler of ice waiting for us (to apply to aching legs as needed).
It was those afternoons spent in the trails by Emily Hampson’s house that I’ll remember the most; you know that private park that had endless rolling hills. The sun heating your back or the breeze off in the shade--the rhythm and the energy we felt were really exhilarating.
My season of cross-country developed from a season of squash. I first met Mr. Parris my Lower winter when I enrolled in club squash. Mr. Parris organized squash in much the same manner, I later discovered, as he organized cross-country. We arrived early, were offered drills, instruction and/or matched with opponents, ran around for a specified number of minutes, and then we were free to leave. Mr. Parris’s activity was integral to the popularity of the sport: He was happy to participate, and routinely did.
Mr. Parris, you are my favorite coach and favorite teacher and favorite part of Exeter. You have taught me to believe that I can always run another hill repeat, run past the finish in the sock game, or crest the top of Stratham Hill just a little bit faster. Many times I have walked the "long way" through the math side of the Academy Building just to peek into your classroom while you were in class. Many times I have looked a little harder as I drove or walked down Tan Lane to see if I could catch a glimpse of you eating oatmeal at your kitchen table.
P- Thank you for encouraging me even when I was so exhausted that I thought I couldn't go on. Thank you for pushing me to achieve my best no matter the situation. Thank you for caring--caring about everything, not simply cross country, but the rest of my life as well. Thank you for putting your all into everything that you did for us, for me. I could go on forever, but really I must simply say that I have never respected and admired anyone more than I do you. I wish you all the best and THANK YOU!
In my three years at Exeter, everything around me has changed. I’ve changed my friends, my room, my roommate, my winter sport, my clothing size, and my attitudes. My grades have gone up and down, and so has the amount of work I do (although not always proportionally!). Through all the turmoil, the one constant has been cross country. No matter what was going on in the rest of my life, for a few hours every day in fall term I could count on a good workout, great friends, and most importantly, Mr. Parris.
Thanks so much for such a great season! I loved running on Dame Road and I will never forget your encouragement when I started getting tired. I am just glad I had the privilege to have you as my coach. Thanks again.
Mr. Parris,
P- Thanks for an amazing three years of cross country. Your gentle guidance has helped me through my times at Exeter, starting at my first jog of the course in prep fall, and I cannot imagine an Exeter without you. When I first think about you, the fall is not what comes to mind. I imagine myself running into you as you are jogging from one place to another, a quick conversation on the path that helps me pick my head up from the pathway and catch up with a person that means a lot to me. I feel the warm oatmeal in my stomach as I sit in your chairs at that really cool table (the pub one if I get the story right) and load my bowl up with apple sauce, brown sugar, and a life's supply of nuts. I see you in the audience at one of my clarinet concerts--the one that I finally told you about before the actual concert instead of catching you as you walk along Tan Lane, often on your way to see another one of your precious runners.
P! When I came to Exeter, cross country was at most a pastime for me, a way to make up for eating everything (unhealthy) in sight and I was at best a mediocre runner. In all honesty, I didn't really enjoy distance running. And although some of those things may have remained the same, my attitude has changed a great deal and you are primarily responsible for that. What I found on your team was a sort of family, with you (of course) at the head: the gentle, encouraging father. It isn't easy to find an environment like that in a sport where individual performance takes precedence over group goals. When I returned to cross country my upper fall it was for this feeling of family, of cohesiveness, and for your quiet support. Thank you for everything, P. See you next year!
P,
Mr. P, you've always been a great coach, very supportive and always prepared!! Gatorade and bananas for hard workouts and excellent home-cooked meals before big races. I think you really helped out a lot of the girls and encouraging them to run together and work together as a team really helped a lot! Since I had the opportunity to have you as a math teacher, I got to see how you worked as a teacher and as a coach. I'm glad though, because it made me realize what a dedicated person you are to teaching and to the girls on the team. I will never forget the oatmeal parties during Meditation, and thank goodness you are a math teacher or else who knows what we would do right before our math tests!
Oh, Mr. Parris, I don't even know where to start in thanking you. But starting at the beginning is good enough, I guess. When I first thought of running cross-country in prep spring, I really had no big hopes or expectations, only some fear of a hard season to come! I still remember that thoughtful pondering look on your face as I answered that no, I hadn't really built up too much mileage, that no, I didn't play any aerobic sports like soccer, but yes, I was willing to train over the summer. Thank you for the gentle confidence, dreams, goals, the pats on my shoulder, the oranges in PO, the right words of encouragement, perfect crisp fall runs, the push to run just one more Stratham hill or 400 around the track (remember the 12?!), the many many oatmeal mornings, and the constant reminders (never really heeded, but always appreciated!) to put some clothes on or at the very least a hat! We've had two wonderful years and although next season will be different, the team will still be guided by your spirit and presence! Thank you -> infinity
P-
Funny how the littlest things can be the most memorable. Of all the memories, from a short two seasons of cross country, the bananas and Gatorade are what popped into my mind first. I think people have a habit of associating smells or tastes with emotions and memories, so perhaps that is why…but even now, when it’s not cross country season, I can’t bring myself to drink Gatorade without a banana in my other hand. It just doesn’t seem right, and even when I manage to get my own bananas and Gatorade, they never taste as good as they do after cross country practice.
Mr. Parris, you came into my life as I was entering the hardest part thus far. Less than thrilled about moving from Alabama to New Hampshire, you were among the first people to make contact with me via e-mail, encourage me, and be both a friend and a coach that I felt comfortable around.
With Mr. Parris, it's not about how much you could do, or how much you think you could do; it's about how much he knows you should do. When you're at practice, he might not let you keep going, but he also might make you keep going. When you get to the point where all the training you've done means something--the meets--then you realize why he forbade you from running one more 400, or why he made you run up all those hills.
Dear P,
Click to see the message from: Contact Information As I compiled messages from over the years, I realized that this project has endowed me with a formidable trove of information: Not only do I have the messages I requested, I also have e-mail addresses and other contact information from all of these people! I do not want this database of knowledge to stay locked in my e-mail account, so I am providing it here in hopes that you may find it useful. If your address has changed and you would like me to change it on this page, please contact me: 07djd @ williams. edu Phillips Exeter Academy Girls’ Cross Country, 1978-2002
Adelaide Williams '94 (Pictou, Nova Scotia) 307 girls ran for PEAGXC between 1978 and 2002. Acknowledgements Alden Smith at the Mountain School, who presented a similar book to Anne Stevens last year, which was the inspiration for this one; -Diana Davis
If you are a former (or even current) PEAGXC runner and would like to see race results and pictures from your cross country season(s) at Exeter, you may be interested to learn that Mr. Parris keeps up a cross country page for his teams, with all of the results since 1978! You can see it at http://math.exeter.edu/rparris/xc.html or if that is not available, http://peanut.8m.net/peagxc/xc.html. The following text appeared as a "watermark" background starting on the front and continuing over the back cover of the book. I took one or two sentences from each message that I felt was a key idea in it, and arranged them in the same order as in the book(chronological by graduation year and alphabetical within that year). The title ("Thanks to P") was printed over it in black on the front cover. Hint: It appeared in this shade of gray on the book, but it's much easier to read here if you highlight it.
Of course I have many memories of running....especially running in the Apple Orchard, coming back to Exeter with my sweats tied at the legs, filled with apples. Running was so much more than sweat, aches and pains, and mental fortitude. For me it was an opportunity to be part of a great family where running for the joy of it was celebrated, and support for each other was paramount. We have kept in touch over the years, and Pam and Rick Parris and their family have meant, and continue to mean a great deal to me.
Lindsay Burke Parrett '79
Oh, wow! Has it been twenty-five years!? It doesn’t seem possible but that is the cruel, irrefutable beauty of math: 1977+25=2002. I don’t remember the details precisely: did you come to us or did Betsy McKay and I come to you? How did girls' cross-country at Exeter start? All I know is that I arrived at Exeter in the fall of 1977. I was a cross-country runner who had run on the boys' JV team in my home town until some federal program (I believe it was title 9) mandated that girls have the same athletic opportunities as boys. Then, I came to Exeter and there was no girls' cross-country team. You made it possible for us to have one. You were the first and have been the only girls' cross country coach at Exeter. That’s really incredible!
Running was always very important to me. As a kid, I loved to run. It was the one athletic thing that I was really good at. I wasn’t fast but I could definitely go the distance. What I loved about long distance running was the solitude and the quiet, the time away from everything, the time it gave me to think. Of course I also loved the sheer joy of running, of being able to move with ease and that endorphin rush that came after 3 or 4 miles. I think the pressures of Exeter would have crushed me if I didn’t have running as a refuge. But what I remember most about cross-country running at Exeter was being part of a team and having a sense of identity and belonging. You gave us that. You were our leader. You gave us cohesion, direction, and support. One of my happiest Exeter memories was not running through the woods, conjugating Latin verbs in my head (what else does one do when running), but drinking hot cider in your apartment and baking Christmas bear decorations with your wife. I remember you playing the harpsichord. I remember Polly as a baby. I remember the feeling of being at ease and included in a happy family gathering. Your personal involvement and concern for our well being was always very clear to me, and when I think back on it, it is really what I remember and what counted for me the most.
I was doing a Google search the other day and came upon the roster of our original Exeter girls' cross-country team (when I egoistically searched my name it was one of the first things that came up). At some time, you must have posted or published it and now we are immortalized in cyberspace! I hope that we can meet again soon in actual space. Until that time, I’d like to say thank you for being with us at the start and keeping the program “running” all these years.
Best Wishes,
Becky Kurth ‘79
Sam Korsak '82
Christine Margerum Harlen '82
Miranda Hope Henning '83
One of my favorite memories is sitting in the van on the way to a meet, eating peanut butter and honey sandwiches on whole wheat bread that he had brought along for us. He also took us to different sites to run. This might have been to practice the challenge of running on the sand or uphill, but I always believed that part of it was for the sheer joy and beauty of running on the beach or in the hills- to make running cross country also about where we were running and what we experienced around us as we ran.
Being on the cross country team was also a great personal growth experience for me. Mr. Parris would talk with me, discuss my running and what could make it better. I never felt embarrased or less important as a team member because I was a neophyte sportswoman, and far from the fastest. I felt that he was interested in me, and how I could improve and get the most of being on the team. I also felt that Mr. Parris taught me a lot about pushing what I believed were my own limits, learning what my body could do when I put my mind to it. From a person who never thought of herself as a sportswoman, I came to believe that I could participate in sports, enjoy them, and learn from challenging myself. I believe that these lessons carry over. I am still amazed that I was able to run in the interschols. Although I never did get a letter, I remember when my name was announced at assembly as the runner whose scores had improved the most. Although this was not surprising given where I started, that didn't make it any less exciting for me. Thank you, Mr. Parris, for inspiring, challenging, teaching, encouraging and believing in me.
Corey Silberstein Shdaimah '83
I also recall that Mr. Parris made you feel good even if you weren't at the front of the pack without being a drill sargeant. He was soft spoken and yet his quiet confidence was contagious.
Lisa Pinto '84
Despite my resistance and obvious poor attitude, Coach Parris never gave me a hard time or criticized me, that I can remember. What I recall is that in the rare instances when I actually completed a workout or participated in a meet, Coach Parris gave me nothing but encouragement. He welcomed me at any level I wished to participate. This was in marked contrast to my college track experience, where my coach did not suffer my foolish antics as gladly.
I started competing in long distance running events many years after graduating from Exeter, when I went to law school. In the 12 years since law school, I've run in dozens of 5K's, at least ten 10K's, several half-marathons and one marathon. I've also competed in several triathlons of varying distances. I served as the running coach of a local YMCA triathlon club last year. One of the most enjoyable experiences of my life was when I captained a 12-member relay team in a 200-mile, 29-hour run from Calistoga, CA to Santa Cruz, CA in 2000.
When I ran my first 5K in law school, a lightbulb went on in my head, and I actually thought of Coach Parris and realized why he had this love of running and what he'd been trying to communicate to me in cross-country practices. I suddenly realized, "Oh! With just a small amount of effort and discipline, I can enjoy running and be a member of the running community!" I've always remembered him gratefully. I've always remembered running in trails in the woods at Exeter with the leaves softening our footfalls. I've always remembered his forgiving manner and steady encouragement. I don't think long distance running would ever have crossed my mind except for my brief experience running cross-country at Exeter.
Now I am pregnant with my first child. I love being pregnant and I'm excited about having a baby, but whenever anyone asks me how I feel about being pregnant, I say, "I CAN'T WAIT TO BE ABLE TO run AGAIN!" I am in love with running. While training for my marathon in freezing winter rains last year, I'd think, "I am so grateful that I can do this!" I can't wait to run another marathon. I really think it all started with Rick Parris and Exeter cross-country and I thank him for the gift of long distance running in my life.
Noël Plummer '84
He remains a dear friend and I frequently communicate with him regarding "life stuff," be it my latest job(s) or my current status as a competitive road runner and triathlete. When I brought the famous Norwegian marathoner Grete Waitz to visit PEA about 6 years ago, Rick was my tie, my booster, and my gracious co-presenter of our visitor. He shares one's enthusiasm as if he were a magnifying glass; he responds with insight and support--and occasionally with some fascinating sidebar on something he himself is doing or has discovered. However he will never boast of his own actions or accomplishments. Let's do that for him!
Yours,
Fiona Bayly '85
Sincerely,
Liz Hecht '86
Although I am no longer able to run due to poor knees and fallen arches, Mr. Parris taught me love sports and to relish daily workouts. Over the course of my tenure on the girls cross-country team I learned a great deal from Mr. Parris about staying healthy. To this day I have not forgotten Mr. Parris' advice: 1) it is best to warm-up and THEN stretch and 2) to excel in running one has to develop the upper body (especially arm and stomach muscles). I think of Mr. Parris' words everytime I do a push-up or sit-up any other type of physical activity that necessitates stretching.
Mr. Parris was more than just my high school running coach. He was a mentor and a faculty member who genuinely cared about me. Each year, I looked forward to returning to Exeter so I could participate on the cross-country team. While running only occupied several hours of my time each week, it probably had the greatest impact on my success and happiness at Exeter.
Elizabeth Robboy '87
Mr. Parris must have known somehow the gift that was for each of us, and I am forever thankful for his insight and caring. He is, without a doubt, one of the main reasons I made it through my years at Exeter. I remember his quick drawings in the dirt to explain each of our routes, I remember him lying flat out on the ground to study my calf muscles when I insisted that my right one was more developed than the left, and his searching for the solitary stone in the road by Apple Annie's on which I first turned my ankle and landed on crutches senior year (later surgery in college!). I remember his hug after I had what will remain a once in a lifetime experience of breaking the tape, winning the class B race at the New England Interscholastics at Taft. I remember sadly his family’s devastating accident and the extraordinary courage they showed through it all. When I went on to college I ran cross-country for two seasons, but my feelings today about running are tied to my experience with Mr. Parris. Perhaps he didn't realize at the time just how much all he did meant to each of us. I'm so glad to have the opportunity to send him now my heartfelt thanks.
Katherine Dauge-Roth '87
Mr. Parris also enlisted the use of video technology to help his runners improve their running technique. I remember running around the outermost fields on the grass, being videotaped, only later to watch the tape and listen to Mr. Parris critique each of us so that we could make strides toward better running. It was painful to watch ourselves at times, but invaluable as a teaching and coaching tool. I later often wished that my college coaches had taken the extra time and energy to incorporate more fun outings and video critiques to keep us relaxed and aware and working hard. Lastly, his work with the captains must have been good, I assume, because our captain, Katherine Roth, was a great one. She led the team members in all kinds of team-building and morale-enhancing activities like secret santas, little parties, and pre-race warm-ups to music. She was full of fun and enthusiasm for the team, which kept us all together in a sport that sometimes can become very individually oriented.
I did not know anyone when I arrived at Exeter, but my experience with cross-country was pivotal in my adjustment to life at Exeter. Mr. Parris and all of my team members were so welcoming and inclusive that I felt an immediate sense of community. I am very thankful for such a wonderful cross-country season and for an unparalleled year of academics, sport, and challenging yet welcoming community. Thanks to Mr. Parris for all of his great efforts and their positive and lasting effects!
Sincerely,
Ellen M. Smith Cron '87
Where to begin? The lessons that you taught me are invaluable. You believed in me and inspired me to push myself to achieve goals that I did not think I could reach. I ran on the team my senior year from 1987 - 1988. I recall that I was the slowest member of the team! That did not matter--the environment that you created allowed all of us to grow, develop and have fun. I thought of you often when I ran my first marathon at Big Sur, CA in 1998. Your words of inspiration were still in my mind and carried me through the run. I now live near San Francisco, have a 13-month-old son and a baby girl due in May! These days, the only running I do is running after my son. Hopefully, I'll be able to pick up the sport again soon. Thanks for everything.
Warm regards,
Arundathi Duleep Tayjasanant '88
It has been many years since you told me to keep a straight back when running up hills, and I still remember it every time I go for a run. You are not only a terrific coach, but also an exceptional educator and one of the kindest and most decent people I ever had the privilege to meet. I wish you and your family all the best.
With much love,
Christine (Chrissy) Kaming Tomas '88
Sincerely,
Nancy Kroohs '88
I distinctly remember the training we did on Shaw's Hill. I can picture the view up what seemed to be an impossibly long slope. I can see myself plodding up, head down with heaving breaths. The exhilarating moment at the top always tempered by knowing you have to turn around and do it again and again and again. What a metaphor. Had I known at the time how helpful this would be in so many other facets of my life, I would have thanked Mr. Parris instead of giving him a look that I cannot remember, but don't doubt crossed my face.
I also remember so fondly our long runs through the apple orchards and New England countryside. He lays out the course and gets us to shake off the comfort of the van ride. A brisk pace develops, those faster quickly move ahead, and I would pair with someone my own speed trying to keep up with the middle of the pack. Mr. Parris would move around and between us, encouraging and moving us along. As we came to a hill he would order us, "Bound up the hill!" When we were out of breath at the top and think for a second that we might be able to get away with stopping to catch our breath, he would follow with, "Recover on the run." I still do this today.
I was never the best or the worst member of the team. Solidly in the middle, I raced against myself every day we went out. I always tried my hardest on those hills though. A strong push up and an even stronger recovery made me feel that I was getting ahead of the pack even though my speed would never have allowed me to finish first. Although I don't think about it consciously, I am sure his words have affected the way I approach other challenges in life. Focusing the hard work in the right areas, working through difficult problems without giving up, creating stubborn optimism. There will inevitably be times when you are going to pause for a breath, but know that you could always run one more mile. Thank you, Mr. Parris.
Betsy Walker '88
PS. Does he still have that "Daddy Long-Legs" T-shirt?
I remember our runs fondly. I think Mr. Parris understood how demanding campus life could be -- as a result, he took us on daily van rides to a new part of the nearby countryside. It gave us a chance to explore how pretty New Hampshire was, and also gave us a chance to clear our heads. I still remember how he would drive us to a new spot, take out a piece of chalk, and draw a map of our run on the asphalt. The routes were all different shapes, but there was a popsicle shaped one that stands out, as well as the runs at the beach and, my favorite, the runs at the apple orchard (with fresh apple cider waiting for us afterwards!).
Though Mr. Parris made us competitive, he also made sure we did everything in moderation--he wanted us to be healthy and look forward to running--he helped make running fun. Mr. Parris was one of those few coaches that motivate someone to do well because of something within--he never made anyone feel bad about themselves; instead, he made you want to try harder. Because of my positive running experiences at Exeter, I continued to run in college and beyond--and I know that had I not had Mr. Parris as a coach, that would not have happened. I wish him the best, and know that every team that has had the chance to run with him has been a lucky one!
Sona Banker '89
On a particularly rainy and cold day, the chalk would be washed away before I, as a middle-of-the-pack runner, even reached the marks. So Mr. Parris would run back and forth between the front and back of the pack, marking the way and running back to tell others about it, then dashing ahead to the front to mark some more. Even so, it was possible to be at a turn in the road, with neither Mr. Parris nor a chalk mark in sight. Ever the complainer (kind of like a kid in the back seat who asks: "Are we there yet?"), I remarked to Mr. Parris at the end of one rainy run that it was tricky to figure out the way when there were no marks and he wasn't in sight. I remember him looking at me, smiling, and saying, "Well, you're here, aren't you? And how great is that?"
That was one of many valuable lessons that I learned from Mr. Parris and from running--that it's not always easy or enjoyable to find the way, but the satisfaction at the end of the route is worth the discomfort. After Exeter, I became nearly addicted to the satisfaction of conquering the physical and mental challenge of running--at times when I've felt lowest, I remember the smug satisfaction of finishing tough courses or training runs and dig in for a run, or even a couple of marathons. Meeting these challenges has given me a stepping stone of confidence to reach even higher in my education, career, and so on.
Appetite for challenge is a difficult thing to cultivate, but Mr. Parris did it masterfully--humbly and subtly. I have a new daughter, Nina, who hardly has a runner's physique right now (see picture). But as I begin to consider the kinds of values that I want her to have, I can only hope that she encounters a Mr. Parris and a pastime that helps her achieve her own goals.
Congratulations, Mr. Parris! Very best wishes,
Nicole Artzer Weeldreyer '90
I fondly recall that Shaw's Hill workout and know that if we did it tomorrow he'd beat me to the top! Thanks for the great four years of running - indoor and cross country.
Arleen Hill ’90
I will never forget the many times you left us deep in the woods of New Hampshire, armed only with the promise of chalk arrows to guide our path at crucial intersections and our own two feet to carry us to various finish lines. One such adventure was the infamous "Apple Annie" run. As one of the slower runners on the team, it was not without trepidation that I considered the road map sketched on the pavement, the seven or eight miles ahead, and the amount of time before the Exeter mini-van was scheduled to depart for campus. As you know, the panicked mind is not necessarily the most mathematical. Despite your prodigious efforts in the classroom, I convinced myself somewhere around mile four that I had to run consecutive five-minute miles if I were to avoid complete and total abandonment... Obviously my calculations were off. Somehow the van was still there when I arrived at Apple Annie's quite a bit later. And somehow you had managed to save me a cup of cider, for which I am forever grateful.
Although I never became a particularly fast runner, the Apple Annie experience turned me into what I think of as a true runner. On your team, I learned how to push myself beyond what I had previously identified as my limits, I learned how to persevere in potentially humbling situations, and most importantly, I learned how to endure (and celebrate) the defeats and victories of my life. Thank you.
With love,
Beth McArthur '90
My other favorite cross-country memory is checking my mailbox the day after a meet--Mr. Parris always distributed a neatly typed list of the results, with words of advice and encouragement for members of the team. I always felt so proud when Mr. Parris pointed out the gains I'd made from the weeks before. Those race results charted my progress through three years of running at Exeter, from a struggling member of the JV team through my final Varsity race. I've saved all of those post-meet wrap-ups, along with each of my race numbers from Exeter--and beyond. They're a treasured source of memories, and I'm so grateful to Mr. Parris for being such a wonderful coach and mentor.
Ellen Connelly Gruber '91
In my mind, you were such a successful coach because you were also a runner.Even during our toughest workouts, you always ran alongside giving us advice and encouraging us to do our best. Your active participation motivated me to run faster and more importantly, it showed me that the joy of running is more than just competing in races.
I have covered many miles (2 marathons and many road races) since Exeter. Thank you for all of the great memories and for nurturing in me a life-long love of running.
Best wishes,
Christine Siegfried Rampe ’91
One piece of advice that you once gave that I've always remembered and used since my Cross Country days: It's OK to eat cookies just before running. :)
Ana Silva '91
Some of my fondest memories at Exeter are of running through the spectacular New England woods with my sister Grace, Christine Siegfried, or Ellen Gruber, and eating at Apple Annie's! Thank you for teaching me the importance of discipline and endurance. They are values that I cherish today in my life as a foreign correspondent.
Eunice Yoon '91
Taline Manassian '92
Mr. P also assisted with the first women's softball team at Exeter. He would join us for our starting run, then help out with catching as we warmed up our throws. It was great to have his support as the program was getting off the ground.
Lillian Montgomery Lilly '92
Take care,
Hilary Norman Hawkins '92
-his running backwards, in front of all of us, with chalk in his hands, to mark the X's at the bottom of hills
-teaching us that our performance in the most difficult circumstances (at the bottom of that hill, in the driving rain) is what would separate the good from the great
-his worship of orange juice as the perfect drink, and packed dirt as the fastest surface on Earth
-his taking a casual, 10-mile run on our days off
-the precision, discipline and impeccable standards of his math classroom, that he brought to the cross-country classroom
-his deep caring for each of his students, each of his runners, each of us.
Cheers, Liz
Elizabeth Urban '92
I also happily recall the runs to the beach, jumping sweaty into the cold waves at the end, the runs at the apple orchard, and scenic runs through the countryside. I also smile when I recall the chalked X's and Y's marking the bottoms and tops of hills between which we were supposed to speed up. Sometimes, during a bad day, I would cry through my whole run and Mr. Parris would chat with me as we ran.
Even in the math classroom Mr. Parris's encouragement affected me deeply. Like on the roads and trails, his positive way of teaching bolstered my confidence incredibly. My four-year stay at Exeter in general was not a very happy one but I have nothing but positive memories of Mr. Parris as a coach and teacher.
Ana Gordan '93
No amount of writing could express my heartfelt gratitude for all that you taught me during my time at Exeter. Your awe-inspiring math lessons launched me into a most beautiful and fulfilling four-year journey in Applied Math at Harvard. Your care and guidance as cross-country coach opened up to me the world of endurance sports, a passion around which my life now revolves.Above all else, your selfless actions and giving attitude (as teacher, mathematician, coach, dorm parent, and father) showed me how a kind and compassionate heart will always be more important than a brilliant intellect or a strong physique. Your graceful balance of mind, body, and spirit made you my most treasured life-long role-model. Mr. Parris, the impact you've had on my life is truly immense to say the least, and it's only just begun to unravel itself! A thousand thank-you's for being the precious gift that you are. There will always be a little Mr. Parris in my heart, and I look forward to sharing him with all those around me for years to come. :)
Deepest thanks,
Edith Chan '94
Co-founder, Coach, and Director of San Francisco Triathlon Club
MSTCM candidate, American College of Traditional Chinese Medicine
(Traditional Chinese Medical doctor in training...)
I have countless memories of my four years running with the girls cross country team and having a mentor like Mr. Parris made every run a growth experience. I truly looked up to him, always amazed at his energy and passion for the sport and for us as a team. I remember the van trips to incredible scenic locations, places that I continued to visit for my runs even after my years at Exeter. Mr. Parris was able to teach so much on the trails, from teamwork and dedication to the pure joy of trail running.
I remember Mr. Parris as a compassionate and meticulous coach. He was always prepared, whether we were meeting on the track, driving to Shaw's Hill, to the beach or the orchard. He always ran right along side us, taking time to talk with each of us. I will also never forget being invited into his home, meeting his lovely wife and daughters, and joining together as a team, a family away from our own, for home-cooked dinners before our big meets. I am so thankful also to his family, for enabling him to devote so much of his time and energy to us, and for supporting him in doing so. Mr. Parris is most certainly the greatest model of the best of Exeter for me, from the trails to the classroom. I hope that over the last 25 years, as a result of touching so many lives, he has enjoyed the fruits of his labor, as he is most deserving of them. Thank you so much.
God Bless,
Christina Marie Svenson Fraser '94
When I was in college I decided I wanted to run a marathon, and asked P if he would train and run it with me. He did, and we ran 26.2 miles through Rhode Island--to keep me distracted, he taught me fractals.
Mr. P makes his runners feel like there is and always will be someone who cares for and believes in them, and we all cared for and believed in one another.
Hugs to P!
Hannah Purdy '95
First, we want to bring up one of our fondest “Coach P” memories.
We will never forget the day that you told the team that if anyone ever bothered them, to turn to that person and with a straight face, look them directly in the eye and say, “You wanna race?” Over the years, this technique for avoiding confrontation has really come in handy. We may be small but we can run…far…
Coach P, you are an amazing person who helped ordinary runners accomplish extraordinary feats. We arrived on your cross country team with many miles under our feet but unsure of how we would fare in our new environment. You enabled us to dip into untapped resources leading us to literally make history by winning Interschols for the first time in school history. You allowed us to lead by example and we gained multitudes of confidence and courage. You trained us on afternoons supporting us on longer runs and coaching us up steep climbs. Your sincere interest and joy of watching us succeed extended beyond our high school days. As we continued to run and compete successfully at the collegiate level, we loved knowing that you checked on our progress and happily received updates. We were able to meet each new challenge with success because early on you instilled that running came from the heart, not the legs.
You’ll be happy to know that we still run, a lot as a matter of fact. These days we run for charity and help others train for endurance events, even coaching!
As we charge forward to complete our 2nd Boston Marathon this April, know that we wouldn’t have gotten this far without your positive influence. You truly love the sport of running and each of us and we felt it with every Coach Parris hug.
Thank you for being a person that we strive to be. A piece of you lives and breathes within us every day.
Thank you for everything and take care,
Meg and Marnie Randall '95
Note: the placement of your pictures looks much better in the actual book.
Love,
Laura Chamberlain '96
It is sad for me to think of Exeter without you coaching cross country. Running my senior year is what made it so wonderful. I remember our "Chariots of Fire" video, running through apple orchards, and the times when I thought I couldn't make it any further but you still managed to cheer me on. We loaded in backs of vans and buses just to travel to anywhere you took us because we knew it would be great. Running along the countryside and water are some of the most vivid images that I still miss today. I rememeber all the laughs we had and wish that I could be in my senior year again. I never considered myself a runner until that year. I will truly remember how great of a coach and friend you were.
Nicole Deana Osborne '96
Susie Chie '97
Amanda Cohen '97
P.S. I think of you whenever I pick up a Rubik's Cube!
P is the kind of person who gives attention to everyone from the fastest to the slowest and most injury-prone runner. I honestly have never felt so valued as a person regardless of my ability. Sometimes I would feel awkward because I was benefiting from the love and kindness of P and Mrs. P and all the other coaches even though I wasn't exactly "putting points on the board" with my race times. However, I got the sense that P's pedagogical approach was to try to instill a sense of confidence and optimism in the runners that would cause us to be the best that we could be even if we were not "the best" in the absolute sense.
P is an absolutely incredible person, and I am forever in awe of his ability to value each person and the unique contributions she can make to the group while simultaneously building a highly competitive cross country team.
Miishe Addy '99
When I try to remember the details of my graduation day, the one I always think about is my interaction with you. I don't even remember what the particular event was, but just that I got the chance to talk to you a little. Although the thought of saying goodbye to you made me cry, it was a calm and happy moment during an otherwise crowded and overwhelming day. After almost four years at Brown University and three NCAA rowing championships behind me I am amazed that I still remember Exeter as the most challenging time in my life so far. Thank you for providing an outlet for me every day, where I could spend time in a different kind of way, quietly or loudly, exhausted or bursting with energy, and go back to the dorm or classroom with a fresh spirit.
With love and best wishes for the future, El
Eleanor Dodson '99
Your confidence in me, as I ran up Stratham Hill (or Stumpfield Road yet again) gave me confidence in myself. I don't know if I have ever been a natural runner. I love running but it has always been something I have to work at. Your program and specifically your individual attention enabled me to run at the collegiate level. I have no doubt that this would be impossible without your dedication. Thank you very much for helping me with running. Yet, more importantly, thank you for believing in me as I struggled through Exeter. I could not have done it without you. Your advice, over countless bowls of oatmeal, shaped me into the person I hope to be.
Sincerely,
Erinn Grimes '01
One trip to a local park I remember particularly well because it was the first serious practice. I was a senior and had never run cross country before, so I was quite determined to keep up, or at least I hoped to. Hills was the workout that day and the number we had to do depended on the quality of our runs. So round a bend on a dirt road we went, up, up, across a grassy slope to the watchtower at the top. After a couple of these, P caught up with me as we started to walk back down for another, suggesting that I pump my arms more to help with the final stretch. (Instruction on how to run--this was a new concept for me.) He also told me that I needed to hold the air inside my lungs longer because I was exhaling so fast it wasn’t doing me much good--advice I could only nod to in agreement between gasps. So imagine my relief when I heard we had done seven quality hills and that was enough. I had done it! I had made it! Through the first practice...of how many? But just as I was wondering how I was going to survive the season, P came over and gave me a couple encouraging words. I can’t even remember what he said--it was probably as simple as "You did well today"--but I remember thinking, "All right, maybe I can do this after all."
Mackenzie Hawkins '01
P is the kind of coach who runs with you, encourages you, and makes you really feel part of the team. No, wait--it’s more like a family. I recall my first year when I joined the team. I was not only a prep; I was a foreigner, too. Intimidated by the older girls, I thought that I would be the one tagging along, moreover dragging along. But P was so spirited, he really knew how to draw you into the runner’s mind. Running really strengthened my confidence. I had come from a team where we ran behind mad taxis in Tokyo. The countryside of New Hampshire was pure bliss in comparison. The van rides with P were unforgettable. Even though I’ve always thought of P as being a sagacious man, he proved to be a big kid at heart. We’d blare music, the windows rolled down, thought we were cool! You know what, though? We were! Thanks, P, for being the best coach I’ll ever have!
Love,
Lauren Boulay '02
I began to meditate about joining cross-country in the spring of my Upper year, when distance running had become the central focus of my athletic life at Exeter. I was nervous about racing longer distances off the track, but Mr. Parris encouraged me, via e-mail over the summer, to run hills. Hill workouts have multiple benefits to for the cross country runner, but the one I remember is attached to the image of “P” explaining to us by exhibition and example, that hills build the ridge of muscle over the knee cap, and knowing which muscles to develop is key knowledge for runners.
I will permanently and immediately associate my cross-country season with my teammates, and P’s generosity of time and spirit for our season was the first standard of our friendships. P brought us together for Chariots of Fire during pre-season. Mrs. Parris and P opened their home to us frequently during the season for team dinners. P rose early to stuff our mailboxes with instructions for meets and pool workouts and blessed the presence of a procession of yellow rubber duckies. P drove us up to the Mountain School in Vershire, Vermont that winter to visit our captain. He came to our indoor track meets, and waved, between hitting flyballs to the softball team, as we ran by in the spring. P brought ice and bananas on the bus when we went to Dame Road or the hills in the Stratham park, and introduced us to an enjoyable interval workout: the sock game. P showed me the entries he had made for me in his database of projected times, and advised me about my goals with infinite interest and patience.
It was P who drilled me on my backhand, helped me with my math homework, and came to my senior poetry reading. P supported my exploration of a new sport I came to love, in part because of his enthusiasm, and his perfect vision, both of the individual runner, and of her collected team. In my cross-country season, I did not race a single varsity-only meet, or post one varsity time. Yet, in one of a few experiences I can relive instantly behind closed eyes, I am sitting in the fourth or fifth center row on the floor of the Assembly Hall with the team at the fall sports assembly listening to our captain call the list of the lettered varsity; I am listening, and I hear my own name. Even as I stand, I am turning, gaping in awe at my fellow senior teammates, who are also rising to their feet. P gave me not only a varsity letter, an outstanding team, and committed coaching, he gave my aspirations considerate audience and respected my athletic capabilities. His gifts, which transcend status and value, continue to enrich my life today.
Jillian Saucier '02
Many of your words echo through my mind each day--as I run down hills, I try to avoid "running in the bucket;" as I walk to class, I remember to take the stairs two at a time because "it strengthens your legs;" as I eat after practice in Dining Hall I remember to "avoid foods whose nutritional value is nil--or negative;" I carry around an ice bag and endure questions as to whether I am carrying a goldfish because I know I am "preventing injury." You told my prep fall math class that if we couldn't solve a problem, we should try "guess and check"--in other words, if we just started doing the problem, we'd have a good chance of solving it. I have remembered this wisdom many times, both within the context of math and out.
I am forever grateful for your quiet wisdom, how you always seem to know exactly what to say, and what to do. Your house is one of the few places where I feel completely cared-for and safe. I recall being the last one to leave after multiple cross country get-togethers and then lingering for an hour or more just to talk with you about our cross country team, about past cross country teams, about math, school, or anything else. Each time I see you, I remember again why it is that I seek you out just to talk with you. While you do not say a lot, your compassion for each of us says the rest. Thank you for devoting your life to Exeter, and your heart to cross country.
Diana Davis '03
Alicia Hernandez '03
Like no other coach or teacher I’ve ever had, Mr. Parris has the ability to both challenge and reassure me at the same time. On the days where I just didn’t feel like running - and there were many of those - Mr. Parris never let me give up or let small problems get in the way of my training. Whether it was in the middle of hill repeats at Stratham Hill when the team’s complaints started building our times up, or at the tail end of the sock game when we all claimed that we simply couldn’t run around that grassy circle one more time, there was Mr. Parris saying we could do it again, and faster than before - and somehow, he was always right. On the occasions when someone really did have a legitimate reason to not run, Mr. Parris never forced the issue or made anyone feel guilty for missing practice. I struggled during my upper year, when I watched my times go almost inexplicably up and up. But Mr. Parris never criticized or put pressure on me, and I am confident that it was his trust (and his challenging workouts) that helped me come back for a successful senior fall.
Cross country has been such a major part of my three years at Exeter. A Monday just doesn’t seem complete without a trip on a Red Dragon out to Dame Road, jogging out to where the pavement ends, then “gliding” over dirt for a five-mile tempo run. Thursdays seem the only appropriate time for a vigorous pool run, and I’ll never again look at a fire tower without thinking of the view from the top of Stratham Hill. Socks, too, have taken on a special meaning after all the miles I have logged with one clasped in my sweaty palm while running around the Exeter playing fields in hot pursuit of whomever is in front of me. Leaving home at 15, being lonely and faced with more work than I thought I could handle, dealing with new friends and trying to keep in touch with those at home, I sometimes felt like I had been set adrift at sea. But the stability of cross country, that daily physical effort and Mr. Parris’ incessant good advice was my life preserver. Whenever I felt like there was too much to think about, I’d find a tangerine from Mr. Parris tucked in my P.O. box, and I’d know that I could look forward to a few hours in the afternoon when I could forget about every issue and just run.
One evening this winter I was at Mr. Parris’ house for extra math help. I was struggling in calculus, it was a typical Exeter winter with mountains of snow, and five A.P. classes left me with no personal time - in short, I was feeling discouraged. After a surprising amount of progress on calculus, I headed back to my dorm but accidentally left my hat behind. The next morning Mr. Parris swooped into my math class, supposedly just to return my lost hat. But tucked inside the wool I found a signature-Mr. Parris tangerine. In the middle of that seemingly hopeless winter, I remembered cross country season and everything we had accomplished. I can say with no reservations that cross country got me through Exeter, and to me, Mr. Parris is cross country. Thank you for everything, Mr. Parris.
Flora MacIvor ’03
Love, Cosby Arnold ’04
Last year, I was struggling to find a sport to do in the fall. Club crew was fun once, but it would not be fun twice. One of my best friends, Jess Chin, suggested that I do cross country with twice her usual enthusiasm. She told me that PEAGXC was the best sport in the world and that I had to do it because P coached it. Within a week, Diana had approached me and had begun to tell me all of the wonderful things about you and the team.
I was very hesitant because I had never done much running before. All of the races that I had done as cross training had been bad experiences. Then, I began to receive cross country mail in my P.O. By this time, I had met Alicia Cooperman and Alicia Hernandez through JV swimming. They had many good things to say about cross country and were very persistent in getting me to join the team. I was invited and went to the annual cookie party. The cookies alone were enough to persuade me! I felt as if I were part of the team even though I really wasn’t yet. I was really impressed that you came to the concert at the end of the term and noticed every single cross country runner.
The incident that really made me decide for sure to join the team was when you came to one of the swim meets. I was incredibly impressed that you came to a JV swimming meet to see Alicia C. and Alicia H. swim. It is all the more impressive because they were both JV runners and technically you didn’t even have to coach them. This proved to me that you genuinely care about each and every runner on the team. I remember swimming extremely well at that meet because I was so impressed.
I’ve never regretted my decision to join the team. It was probably the best decision that I’ve made here. I love everything about the team. The coaches, the team itself, the bananas, oatmeal, and Gatorade, the variety in the practices, the sock game, Dame Road, pool running, analyzing all of the times on the website, the happiness and determination, and everything else is just wonderful. The fall term has changed from the season that I didn’t know what to do with to my favorite season of the year with PEAGXC. I just can’t wait for next year to begin so I can run again. Thank you for all you have done. Cross country with you and the team has been the very best experience that I’ve had here at Exeter.
Carolyn Atwood '04
And then there is the picture of you hiding behind a tree on that killer hill at Interschols my lower year at Andover, sneaking out to cheer me on. Or your orders to beat the old guy (you) while I huff and puff up the ski slope at Manchester. Or your dismay when we saw hunters on Dame Road and moved our workout further down the road. Or the look on your face when Jules and I come out of the woods at some random point after going "exploring." Or a quick visit as you stop through the trainer after practice and say hi to your girls.
But my favorite image is the feel of your hand patting my back as you tell me that I did a good job after a huge hill workout or ten 400's on the track. For me, that is the ultimate accomplishment. Your love for Dame Road, Apple Annie's, ice, bananas, Gatorade, and every single girl on the team, past and present, shows in everything you do. So thanks P- I can’t wait for one last season with you. We love you. I love you.
Alicia Cooperman '04
Sincerely,
Sarah Hausman '04
You’ve got it down. I know there’s no way I could possibly describe the full extent of what you’ve done for me; the best I can do is give you a bit of the memories I have and trust that you’ll understand just how much you’ve done. From day one when I was a scared little prep, you opened your door as a place where I could find support, fun, friendship, and love. You reached out to me, as you do all your girls, to give us someone, an adult, whom we could go to for guidance in a place where we were so much more on our own than most students our age.
First off, the food... because let’s be real now, good nutrition is key! You and Mrs. P have been the best-what other coach loves his girls enough that even after hour-long-plus practices every day he’ll still open his kitchen to all of them, even letting Alicia and me invade with our chocolate-chip runner frostified cookies? And even more importantly, the chez Parris specialty that is a highlight of my week, your superb oatmeal. Not to mention I am holding you responsible for making me a complete addict for homemade cinnamon rolls-my god those are good!
On a more serious note, you have become someone who I have the security of knowing that I can always turn to. With my injury, you have been amazing. I couldn’t have asked for more from a coach. You knew about it prep spring before I even told you, and checked on me. That summer you e-mailed me Web sites with information to read, learning about it right along with me. You rarely find a coach who cares that much about his runners. When I was frustrated and in tears, not only did you share that frustration, but you kept me away from the dangers of my mind. When I was losing it, you would grab me by the shoulders, look me in the eye, and make me come back to my senses. Even more, despite that I never seem to get better, you’ve never lost your patience, added to my struggles, or pushed me too hard, and that has helped me, eased me, and saved me more than I could express to you.
You’re always there with your big smile at those key times on Dame Road or Stratham Hill, and even though yes, there are the occasional times when I’d love to slap the happy little look off your face and stuff a sock in your mouth (hey, we’ve got enough of ’em...), it always kept me going.
But the most amazing thing is, you’ve done this for every single one of us. I want you to know, P, you are what makes our team so remarkably happy and close. You’ve given us everything. Because of you, cross-country has gotten a name for itself at this school. If you say you’re on the team now, other students are impressed; they know the work we put in; they know how amazing the atmosphere of the team is-basically, it’s gotten a name for itself, all because of you. Your effort, your passion, and love is the very foundation of our success and it will never leave. Thank you.
Love always, Julia Hudson ‘04
It is really saddening to hear that you will no longer be the head coach of girls cross country--everyone is going to miss your fun workouts, Apple Annie's, DAME ROAD, the sock game, orienteering, Stratham Hill, oh and of course the ones where we run around the track at least 50 times... It's hard to imagine what it will be like!
P, you are such a great coach and I know that I haven't even said a thirtieth of all those great qualities, but cross country is definitely not going to be the same next year. I will miss the past two years, but hopefully there will still be many more fun times to come!
Yours truly,
Melissa Itsara '04
Love, Kalina King '04
I came to the Exeter team after two years of Cross Country and Track coaching from a coach who ended up offering up his house and family to me when my parents moved away. Coming hard on the heels of a surrogate dad, you had a tough act to follow. But, through lemonade and bananas, Wednesday morning oatmeal, and the special P brand of smiles and pats on the back you made your mark as an incredible coach. I can begin to explain how important PEAGXC has been to my integration into Exeter and how important your guidance has been to me, both as a runner and as a person. I'm still running cross country because you convinced me I could, and I'm still running track because you told me I should (ooh! rhyme!). Thanks for keeping me on my toes (and for keeping my “head up!”)... I don't think I could have fallen into better hands.
Love,
Chloë Pinkerton ’04
It was the perfect way to start my life here, at PEA, with preseason and the peppy bunch of runners you’ve loved and trained. I guess your enthusiasm rubs off, because I never felt uncomfortable for a moment and was immediately welcomed in by that smiling group of girls… and you. I had never met a coach who cared so deeply about his runners, before coming here. Your constant encouragement and faith in us, as runners and people, is the best kind of training and coaching anyone could get. You make us all want to try, and want to simply be all that we can…and because of that we do, and we are. Thank you for everything, for making me the runner I could be, and the person I should.
I’ll miss your clementines.
Much love,
Emma Hiza '05
I have to say that cross-country last fall is what kept me going. When I doubted my ability to be successful academically, I knew that you were working the best you could to make me and the rest of the team feel as though we were succeeding athletically. And it worked. Every day I arrived at the Cage and knew that the workout you had designed would develop friendships among teammates while simultaneously preparing us for success at Interschols. Many of my closest friends are those I ran with daily in cross-country. We did hills together; we did 12x400 together; we did the Sock Game together.
The difference between the PEAGXC team and other teams that I have been apart of is the coach-athlete relationship. We didn't leave from practice as quickly as possible. Instead, we stayed. We ate bananas and drank Gatorade and talked to each other, athlete and coach alike--not only about running, but about whatever was on our minds.
Thank you for the memories, including tracking our pulse rates on Stratham Hill and encouraging us to maintain pace while climbing the final hill on Dame Road... Can't wait until XC 2003 and 2004!
Allison Pennock '05
But not all of being on PEAGXC is about the training. It's also about running together, drinking Gatorade together, stretching, and eating bananas--lots of them. The casual way we travel everywhere in our red buses to practices brings the team together and makes the whole thing fun. Without Mr. Parris to help us train, rest, and be a supportive team, I don't know what kind of shape I would've been in at the end of the season. THANKS, P!!!!!
Laura Tabor '06
We just wanted to let you know
That we love you so
Cross Country was complete with you
Without you, we would have never beaten the blue!
(at New England Championships)
You're the most caring, loving, fun, and cunning -
You could always keep us running!
You're the best coach ever, and you well know
We will never let you go!
We love you, Mr. Parris!
Eva Glasrud ’05 and Sasha DeWitt ’06
Lindsay Burke Parrett '79
Becky Kurth '79
Sam Korsak '82
Christine Margerum Harlen '82
Miranda Hope Henning '83
Corey Silberstein Shdaimah '83
Lisa Pinto '84
Noël Plummer '84
Fiona Bayly '85
Liz Hecht '86
Elizabeth Robboy '87
Katherine Dauge-Roth '87
Ellen M. Smith Cron '87
Arundathi Duleep Tayjasanant '88
Christine Kaming Tomas '88
Nancy Kroohs '88
Betsy Walker '88
Sona Banker '89
Nicole Artzer Weeldreyer '90
Arleen Hill '90
Beth McArthur '90
Ellen Connelly Gruber '91
Christine Siegfried Rampe ’91
Ana Silva '91
Eunice Yoon '91
Taline Manassian '92
Lillian Montgomery Lilly '92
Hilary Norman Hawkins '92
Elizabeth Urban '92
Ana Gordan '93
Edith Chan '94
Christina Marie Svenson Fraser '94
Hannah Purdy '95
Meg and Marnie Randall '95
Laura Chamberlain '96
Nicole Deana Osborne '96
Susie Chie '97
Amanda Cohen '97
Miishe Addy '99
Eleanor Dodson '99
Erinn Grimes '01
Mackenzie Hawkins '01
Lauren Boulay '02
Jillian Saucier '02
Diana Davis '03
Alicia Hernandez '03
Flora MacIvor '03
Cosby Arnold '04
Carolyn Atwood '04
Alicia Cooperman '04
Sarah Hausman '04
Julia Hudson '04
Melissa Itsara '04
Kalina King '04
Chloë Pinkerton '04
Eva Glasrud '05
Emma Hiza '05
Allison Pennock '05
Sasha DeWitt '06
Laura Tabor '06
Lindsay Burke Parrett ‘79
lindspar17@aol.com
Becky Kurth ‘79
rjk1@columbia.edu
Sandra (Sam) Korsak ‘82
samkorsak@aol.com
Christine Margerum Harlen ‘82
christine.harlen@virgin.net
Miranda Hope Henning ‘83
cbearhenning@msn.com
Corey Silberstein Shdaimah ‘83
cshdaima@brynmawr.edu
Lisa Pinto ‘84
lisa_pinto88@hotmail.com
(212)472-1893
Noël Plummer ‘84
nplum@cc.co.contra-costa.ca.us
Deputy County Counsel
Office of the County Counsel
P.O. Box 69 Martinez, CA 94553-0116
(925) 335-1827
(925) 646-2461 fax
Fiona Bayly ‘85
fbayly@wcs.org
Executive Assistant (to)
John A. Gwynne
Vice President and Chief Creative Officer
Exhibit and Graphic Arts Department
The Wildlife Conservation Society
2300 Southern Boulevard
Bronx, NY 10460
Tel: 718.220.7131
Liz Hecht ‘86
terra.mom@verizon.net
Elizabeth Robboy '87
lizrobboy@aol.com
Katherine Dauge-Roth ‘87
kdauge@bowdoin.edu
Ellen M. Smith Cron ‘87
emarysmith@aol.com
Wrentham, Massachusetts
Arun Duleep Tayjasanant ‘88
twoblues@covad.net
Nancy Kroohs ‘88
kroohs@bestweb.net
Christine (Chrissy) Kaming Tomas ‘88
christine.tomas@qs.com
Betsy Walker ‘88
betsywalker@hotmail.com
309-29 Camden Street
Toronto, ON M5V 3N3
Canada
416-703-9271
Sona Banker ‘89
sona_banker@yahoo.com
Nicole Artzer Weeldreyer ‘90
nicole.weeldreyer@qs.com
Arleen A Hill ‘90
ahill@bucknell.edu
Beth McArthur ‘90
beth_mcarthur@yahoo.com
Ellen Connelly Gruber ‘91
markandellen@attbi.com
Ellen Connelly Cohen
21421 Sanford Street
Los Angeles, CA 90066
Christine Siegfried Rampe ‘91
kevinrampe@aol.com
Eunice Yoon ‘91
eunice.yoon@cnbcasia.com
Taline Manassian ‘92
taline@austin.rr.com
Lillian Montgomery Lilly ‘92
lillianlilly@yahoo.com
Hilary Norman Hawkins ‘92
hilary_norman@med.unc.edu
Elizabeth Urban ‘92
elizabeth_urban@mckinsey.com
McKinsey & Co, San Francisco
415-318-5072 (p)
415-318-4824 (f)
Ana Gordan ‘93
anag@grahamgund.com
Ana Gordan LEED(TM)
Accredited Professional
Graham Gund Architects
47 Thorndike Street
Cambridge, MA 02141
t. 617-250- 6845
f. 617-577-9614
Edith Chan ‘94
edith@edithchan.com
978 Valencia St. #101
San Francisco, CA 94110
www.edithchan.com
Christina Marie Svenson Fraser ‘94
cms6494sdf@aol.com
Hannah Purdy ‘95
hannahpurdy@yahoo.com
Meg and Marnie Randall '95
megsrandall@yahoo.com
Laura Chamberlain ‘96
lauracham@hotmail.com
Nicole Deana Osborne ‘96
nicoledeana@yahoo.com
Susie Chie ‘97
susan.chie@citigroup.com
Amanda Cohen ‘97
amandac@boalthall.berkeley.edu
Miishe Addy ‘99
addy@fas.harvard.edu
322 Pforzheimer Mail Center
Cambridge, MA 02138
Eleanor Dodson ‘99
eleanor_dodson@brown.edu
Erinn Grimes ‘01
egrimes@middlebury.edu
Mackenzie Hawkins ‘01
jhawkins3@phillips.exeter.edu
Lauren Boulay ‘02
gaougirl@hotmail.com
Jillian Saucier ‘02
jsaucier@exeter.edu
Diana Davis ‘03
ddavis@exeter.edu
Alicia Hernandez ‘03
ahernandez@exeter.edu
Flora MacIvor '03
fmacivor@exeter.edu
Cosby Arnold '04
carnold@exeter.edu
Carolyn Atwood ‘04
catwood@exeter.edu
Alicia Cooperman '04
acooperman@exeter.edu
Sarah Hausman ‘04
shausman@exeter.edu
Melissa Itsara ‘04
mitsara@exeter.edu
Kalina King ‘04
kking@exeter.edu
Chloë Pinkerton '04
cpinkerton@exeter.edu
Eva Glasrud '05
eglasrud@exeter.edu
Allison Pennock ‘05
apennock@exeter.edu
Sasha DeWitt '06
andewitt@dewitt.com
Laura Tabor ‘06
ltabor@exeter.edu
Please note: If you are concerned about your e-mail address appearing on the Web and companies finding it and sending you spam, you need not be afraid. I have left out the formatting that such search programs look for, which looks like this: ddavis@exeter.edu. The only people who will find your contact information are those who specifically find this page first. I personally have had my address appear for more than a year in the "dangerous" formatting as you see on this page and have never received unsolicited spam. That said, if you would like to have any of this information removed, just let me know at the aforementioned e-mail address. Thanks!
*captain see message
Alexandra Whelan '79 (Chula Vista, CA)
Alexandra Wilson '04 (North Hampton, NH)
Alexis Jacob '97 (Houston, TX)
*Alicia Cooperman '04 (Hillsborough, CA)
Alicia Hernandez '03 (Dallas, TX)
Allison Pennock '05 (Barrington, NH)
Alwynne Wilbur '85 (Washington, DC)
Alysoun Kegel '99 (Chicago, IL)
*Alyssa Nering '88 (Indianapolis, IN)
Amanda Cohen '97 (Loomis, CA)
Amy Bragdon '83 (Cumberland Foreside, ME)
*Amy Brown '83 (Kenosha, WI)
Amy Kim '91 (Queensbury, NY)
Amy Krulak '82 (Alexandria, VA)
Amy Mahon '00 (Chevy Chase, MD)
Amy Park '92 (Bakersfield, CA)
Amy Pepin '94 (Salem, NH)
Amy Rowe '00 (Cleveland, MS)
Ana Gordan '93 (Manchester, MA)
Ana Silva '91 (Saunderstown, RI)
Andrea Pelosi '88 (Quincy, MA)
Angela Salas '84 (King of Prussia, PA)
Ann Chiou '88 (Lynnfield, MA)
Ann Gagliardi '89 (Athol, MA)
Anna Felton '05 (Greenland, NH)
*Annalisa Cox '01 (Lee, NH)
Annapurna Duleep '94 (Norwalk, CT)
Anne Powell '80 (New York, NY)
Anya Weber '92 (Exeter, NH)
Arleen Hill '90 (Newmarket, NH)
Arundathi Duleep '88 (Norwalk, CT)
Ashley Jennings '99 (Saudi Arabia)
*Beth Schmidt '82 (Westport, NY)
Beth Schuchert '82 (Canton, OH)
Betty Huang '92 (Worcester, MA)
Birdie Soti '93 (Moline, IL)
Bridget Goodbody '81 (Cumberland, ME)
Carolina Zingg '95 (Caracas, Venezuela)
Carolyn Atwood '04 (Rockford, IL)
Carolyn Gill '92 (San Antonio, TX)
Carolyn Leuner '98 (Goshen, NY)
Carrie Bourguignon '99 (Cypress Park, TX)
Catherine Corry '88 (Iowa City, IA)
Chloë Pinkerton '04 (New York, NY)
Christina Love '95 (St Louis, MO)
*Christina Minicucci '92 (North Andover, MA)
Christina Svenson '94 (Salem, NH)
Christina Thompson '94 (Greenwich, CT)
*Christine Cynn '86 (Old Lyme, CT)
*Christine Kaming '88 (New York, NY)
Christine Lin '94 (Taiwan)
Christine Margerum '82 (Salem, MA)
Christine Siegfried '92 (Short Hills, NJ)
Cleary Hallett '02 (South Londonderry, VT)
Corey Silberstein '83 (Hewlett Bay Park, NY)
*Corey Zimmerman '97 (Marstons Mills, MA)
Cosby Arnold '04 (Nashville, TN)
Courtney Jennings '97 (Saudi Arabia)
Courtney Wilson '04 (Southborough, MA)
Curran Osenton '99 (Westport, CT)
Cynthia Daffron '87 (Bethesda, MD)
Dana Bowden '89 (Seattle, WA)
Danielle Dinovelli-Lang '95 (Hartford, CT)
Desi Fairly '06 (Arleta, CA)
*Diana Davis '03 (Madbury, NH)
Diana Gibson '92 (El Paso, TX)
*Diane Bohn '90 (Exeter, NH)
Dorothy Bennett '82 (New York, NY)
*Edith Chan '94 (Weston, MA)
Elaine Braithwaite '03 (Chicago, IL)
Elaine Parker '98 (South Burlington, VT)
Elaine Wang '98 (Trumbull, CT)
*Eleanor Dodson '99 (Ashfield, MA)
Elisabeth Shapiro '82 (Manchester, NH)
Elizabeth Fleming '86 (Spartanburg, SC)
Elizabeth Goldhirsh '96 (Manchester, MA)
Elizabeth Hecht '86 (East Grand Rapids, MI)
Elizabeth McArthur '90 (Rockville Center, NY)
*Elizabeth McKay '79 (Lyndonville, VT)
Elizabeth Robboy '87 (Cambridge, MA)
Elizabeth Urban '92 (Concord, MA)
Elizabeth Walker '88 (Lagrange, IL)
Ella Meyerson '98 (Atwater, MN)
Ellee Dean '01 (Bedford, NH)
Ellen Gruber '91 (Portsmouth, NH)
Ellen Smith '87 (White River Junction, VT)
*Emily Davidson '92 (Hebron, ME)
Emily Hampson '02 (Exeter, NH)
Emily Stork '03 (Bellevue, WA)
Emma Hiza '05 (Exeter, NH)
*Emma Penick '94 (Halifax, Nova Scotia)
Erica Dueger '82 (Concord, NH)
Erin Brannigan '03 (Danville, PA)
Erin Burns '91 (North Andover, MA)
*Erinn Grimes '01 (Poquoson, VA)
Eunice Yoon '91 (Seoul, Korea)
Eva Glasrud '05 (Waterloo, IA)
Eva Gonda '81 (Andover, MA)
Eve Biddle '00 (New York City, NY)
Evelyn Kao '91 (Chesterfield, VA)
Fatima Ahmad '00 (Murphysboro, IL)
*Fiona Bayly '85 (Troy, NY)
*Flora MacIvor '03 (Willoughby, OH)
Ginny Kullman '97 (New Orleans, LA)
Gopi Shah '98 (Shreveport, LA)
*Grace Yoon '93 (Seoul, Korea)
Hannah Knipple '03 (Geneva, NY)
Hannah Purdy '95 (Chloe, WV)
Hannah Taylor '98 (Hopkinton, NH)
*Heather Roberts '90 (Michigan City, IN)
Helen Schubert '02 (Far Hills, NJ)
Helen Yung '96 (Hong Kong)
Hilary Norman '92 (Rye, NY)
Ina Mogollon '98 (Bogota, Colombia)
Irene Hui '97 (Hong Kong)
Isobel Ridge '97 (Upperville, VA)
Jane Bolgatz '83 (West Sand Lake, NY)
Janet Lo '90 (Huntington Beach, CA)
Janet McCrae '00 (York, SC)
Janna Lewis '91 (Youngstown, OH)
Jeanne Chuang '92 (Taiwan)
Jeeyoung Choi '02 (Bayside, NY)
Jenna Leahy '06 (Exeter, NH)
Jenna Robertson '97 (West Newbury, MA)
Jenna Steere '87 (North Hampton, NH)
Jennifer Frank '89 (San Francisco, CA)
Jennifer Gorman '04 (Chinle, AZ)
Jennifer Hung '98 (Bad Axe, MI)
*Jennifer Plummer '89 (Lisbon Falls, ME)
Jennifer Shein '01 (Northridge, CA)
Jennifer Tharp '84 (Cobleskill, NY)
Jess Clancy '01 (Evanston, IL)
Jesse Woodlock '06 (Eliot, ME)
Jessica Chin '04 (Hong Kong, PRC)
Jessica Hung '00 (Bad Axe, MI)
Jessica Salomons '03 (Forest Hills, NY)
Jill Wheaton '98 (East Holden, ME)
Jillian Saucier '02 (South Freeport, ME)
*Jolene Hampson '99 (Exeter, NH)
Jordan Selig '05 (Seattle, WA)
Josie Gill '94 (San Antonio, TX)
Joy Winter '96 (Florissant, MO)
Julia Cornish '93 (New London, CT)
Julia Hudson '04 (New London, NH)
Julia Johnson '79 (State College, PA)
Julia Nizinski '04 (Andover, MA)
Julie Andrews '83 (Wynne, AR)
Julie Wilhelmy '95 (Weston, CT)
*Kalina King '04 (San Francisco, CA)
Karen Fingerman '82 (Des Moines, IA)
Karen Tsui '00 (Hong Kong)
Karen Yung '96 (Hong Kong)
Karin Siegfried '87 (Short Hills, NJ)
Karina Necas '90 (Jalisco, Mexico)
Kasia Symborski '01 (Queensbury, NY)
Kate Furze '89 (Exeter, NH)
Kate Lyon '01 (Hyannisport, MA)
Katherine Goodrich '92 (Chappaqua, NY)
*Katherine Roth '87 (Mechanicsburg, PA)
Katherine Roussos '95 (Concord, NH)
Katherine Wolff '98 (Pittsburgh, PA)
Kathryn Sullivan '02 (Menlo Park, CA)
Kelly Anderson '83 (Exeter, NH)
Kelly Leader '86 (Putney, VT)
Kelly Stuart '89 (North Canton, OH)
Kerstin Pastujova '99 (Miami, FL)
Kim Pryce '90 (Amherst, NH)
Kimberley Sippel '84 (Hong Kong)
Kirsten Burmester '95 (Washington, DC)
Kirsti Orvik '83 (Guelph, Ontario)
Kory Crawford '95 (Monmouth, ME)
Kristen Upchurch '85 (Westport, CT)
Kristin Kuhlman '85 (Decorah, IA)
Kristina Bunce '05 (Hampton, NH)
Latoya McFarland '90 (Dayton, OH)
Laura Chamberlain '96 (London, England)
Laura Frankel '83 (Annapolis, MD)
Laura Gassman '00 (East Orange, NJ)
Laura Lee '95 (Charleston, WV)
Laura Tabor '06 (Portsmouth, NH)
Lauren Boulay '02 (Stuttgart, Germany)
*Leah Ciaschi '00 (Skaneateles, NY)
Leah Pate '97 (Dana Point, CA)
Lesley Workman '84 (Boca Raton, FL)
Leslie Howes '84 (San Francisco, CA)
Leslie Kane '87 (New York, NY)
Letitia Ames '85 (New London, CT)
Lillian Lo '94 (Taiwan)
Lillian Montgomery '92 (Campobello, SC)
Linda Chang '89 (Schenectady, NY)
Linda Tivorsak '98 (Atchison, KS)
Lindi von Mutius '99 (Natick, MA)
Lindsay Burke '79 (Weston, MA)
*Lindsay Sellers '95 (Rockland, DE)
Lindsey Mead '92 (Cambridge, MA)
Lindsey Wetzel '92 (Kingston, NH)
Lisa Carrier '92 (Newburyport, MA)
Lisa Gammon '99 (Gastonia, NC)
Lisa Gorry '86 (Due West, SC)
Lisa Pinto '84 (London, England)
Liza Covington '01 (Coeur d'Alene, ID)
Lori Lacy '90 (Palos Verdes Estates, CA)
Lucy Chie '92 (Leominster, MA)
Lyssandra Barbieri '86 (Westport, CT)
Lystra Hayden '00 (Cape Neddick, ME)
Mackenzie Hawkins '01 (Cos Cob, CT)
Maia Feigon '94 (South China, ME)
Margaret Jones '02 (Saudi Arabia)
Margaret McKay '81 (Lyndonville, VT)
Margaret Randall '95 (Westbrook, ME)
Margaret Timothy '80 (Falmouth, ME)
Maria Schumann '84 (Glover, VT)
Marion White '82 (Greenwich, CT)
*Marissa Piropato '93 (Oakland, NJ)
Marsha Campbell '88 (Glen Oaks, NY)
Martha Randall '95 (Westbrook, ME)
Mary Claire Walsh '03 (New Haven, VT)
Mary Peabody '80 (Salem, MA)
Maureen Casuscelli '83 (Tustin, CA)
Maureen Tracey '03 (Westhampton, NY)
Meghan Prin '01 (Stone Harbor, NJ)
Melissa Itsara '04 (Modesto, CA)
Melissa Pulling '91 (Lynnfield, MA)
Meredith Richardson '87 (Portsmouth, NH)
Miishe Addy '99 (Trabuco Canyon, CA)
Mikaela Sawtelle '82 (Wilton, CT)
Miranda Hope '83 (Merrimac, MA)
Miranda Jennings '96 (Saudi Arabia)
Miriam Zincke '87 (Rochester, MN)
*Moira Lawlor '83 (Keene, NH)
Nadia Hilliard '00 (Richmond, VA)
Nancy Kroohs '88 (Matamoras, PA)
Natalie Rowe '02 (Fort Monroe, VA)
Nellie Carter '96 (Southbury, CT)
*Nicole Artzer '90 (Westport, CT)
Nicole Lundberg '96 (Seattle, WA)
Nicole Marquis '87 (Mendon, MA)
Nicole Osborne '96 (Davenport, IA)
Nicole Popov '02 (New York, NY)
Noel Plummer '84 (Robertsfield, Liberia)
Norma Esparza '93 (Santa Ana, CA)
Paige Smith '84 (Chicago, IL)
Patricia Barrientos '97 (Flushing, NY)
*Paulina Jerez '91 (Sparks, MD)
Rachael Martin '91 (Tequesta, FL)
Rachel Lerner '89 (Allentown, PA)
Radhika Jagannathan '01 (Essex Junction, VT)
Rebecca Kurth '79 (Methuen, MA)
Rebecca Purcell '90 (Beverly, MA)
Robin Jones '88 (Newton, MA)
Rosellen Roche '90 (Pittsburgh, PA)
Sage Orr '97 (Falmouth, ME)
Sally Funkhouser '82 (Okemos, MI)
*Sandra Korsak '82 (Natick, MA)
Sara Bliss '91 (New York, NY)
Sarah Aasbo '01 (Quogue, NY)
Sarah Beckjord '80 (Washington, DC)
Sarah Edson '96 (Maitland, FL)
Sarah Hausman '04 (Rolling Hills Estates, CA)
Sarah Schulz '96 (Craftsbury Common, VT)
*Sarah Stuckey '91 (Portland, ME)
Sarah Zeidel '02 (Pittsburgh, PA)
Sasha DeWitt '06 (Coral Gables, FL)
Sasha Diaz-Almaral '99 (Windsor, CT)
*Savannah Cowley '00 (Sherman, CT)
Shannon Barnes '97 (East Bridgewater, MA)
*Shannon Martin '84 (Mt Vernon, NH)
Shannon Salembier '04 (Burlington, VT)
Shari Kearl '80 (Freeville, NY)
Sheila Morrissey '85 (Irvington, NY)
Sheilah Lloyd '95 (Cape Elizabeth, ME)
Sheldon Kendall '84 (Rochester, NH)
Shirley Lim '86 (Bakersfield, CA)
Sindu Maliakal '91 (Norfolk, MA)
Sona Banker '89 (Weston, MA)
Sonna Moon '93 (Alexandria, VA)
Sophia Karabatsos '94 (Kingston, NY)
Stacey Lucas '92 (Hilton Head, SC)
Susan Beatty '86 (Weston, MA)
*Susan Drouilhet '81 (Lexington, MA)
Susan Fernandez '87 (Erie, PA)
Susan Gagliardi '95 (Athol, MA)
Susan Lee '83 (Eliot, ME)
Susan Plath '85 (Yorktown Heights, NY)
*Susan Zahran '96 (Oak Brook, IL)
Susannah Stevens '98 (Washington, DC)
Susie Chie '97 (Leominster, MA)
Susie Yim '93 (Rockville Center, NY)
Suzanne Lasser '85 (Pawtucket, RI)
Taline Manassian '92 (Corpus Christi, TX)
Tanya Dyson '87 (Atlanta, GA)
Tanya Tivorsak '97 (Atchison, KS)
*Tena Vaughn '87 (Pasadena, CA)
Theresa Hahn '98 (Omaha, NE)
Thersa Tao '86 (Hong Kong)
Tiffany De Sa Pereira '98 (Neuilly, France)
Tracey Paulauskas '91 (Bedford, NH)
Traci Trotzer '86 (Exeter, NH)
Vanessa Ring '98 (Exeter, NH)
Venus Choi '03 (Hong Kong, PRC)
Victoria Hartman '90 (Exeter, NH)
Virginia Anderson '00 (New Haven, CT)
Wei-Yen Mao '86 (Chambersburg, PA)
*Wendy Holt '86 (Janesville, WI)
Wynne Love '88 (San Diego, CA)
Zoe Harris '00 (Brookline, MA)
All information gathered from Mr. Parris's cross country page
Dale Braile, who contacted the Alumni Office to assure them of the validity of this project so that I could contact former PEAGXC runners;
Christine Fell at the Alumni Office, who coordinated the mass e-mailing;
Fiona Bayly '85, who consulted on an important detail;
Beth McArthur '90, who was so dedicated that when her e-mail to me kept bouncing back, she printed out her message and sent it in an envelope;
the more than 50 girls and women who took time to reflect upon their experiences and write such thoughtful messages for their coach;
and most of all, Mr. Parris, whose committment to his cross country teams and runners changed the lives of so many girls.
April 27, 2003
One of my fondest memories was when Rick and Pam Parris brought all of us into their home (apartment I believe it was) and shared with us a spaghetti supper the night before a race. I came to Exeter and there was no girls' cross-country team. You made it possible for us to have one. You were the first and have been the only girls' cross country coach at Exeter. That’s really incredible! Mr. Parris always helped me find the best in me. Without his encouragement, though, I probably would have given up on running. Mr. Parris helped me to realize a very successful season, and he was a constant of calm and rational thought in the face of my nerves over racing and adjusting to the school. Mr. Parris taught me a lot about pushing what I believed were my own limits, learning what my body could do when I put my mind to it. He was soft spoken and yet his quiet confidence was contagious. When I ran my first 5K in law school, a light bulb went on in my head, and I actually thought of Coach Parris and realized why he had this love of running and what he'd been trying to communicate to me in cross-country practices. He was, to me, one of the most important people when I was a student at PEA, largely because he went beyond being just a cross country coach (and also math teacher). He inspired in me a love of running that I carry with me to this day. I think of Mr. Parris' words every time I do a push-up or sit-up any other type of physical activity that necessitates stretching. I remember him lying flat out on the ground to study my calf muscles when I insisted that my right one was more developed than the left, and his searching for the solitary stone in the road by Apple Annie's on which I first turned my ankle and landed on crutches senior year. It was thoughtful and resourceful of Mr. Parris to make the extra effort to arrange for us to have chances to run away for a little while each week; it made the Exeter experience even more fun and memorable. The lessons that you taught me are invaluable. You believed in me and inspired me to push myself to achieve goals that I did not think I could reach. You are not only a terrific coach, but also an exceptional educator and one of the kindest and most decent people I ever had the privilege to meet. I'd never before had a coach who brought us to so many different places for so many different types of runs. Mr. Parris had the right personality to lead a gangly group of teen girls through the New England back roads. I still can't imagine how he did it without going nuts. Definitely an even-keeled guy. Mr. Parris was one of those few coaches that motivate someone to do well because of something within--he never made anyone feel bad about themselves; instead, he made you want to try harder. I remarked to Mr. Parris at the end of one rainy run that it was tricky to figure out the way when there were no marks and he wasn't in sight. I remember him looking at me, smiling, and saying, "Well, you're here, aren't you? And how great is that?" There is one particular workout that I remember like it was yesterday, racing Mr. Parris to the top of Shaw's Hill - repeatedly. Somehow the van was still there when I arrived at Apple Annie's quite a bit later. And somehow you had managed to save me a cup of cider, for which I am forever grateful. I've saved all of those post-meet wrap-ups, along with each of my race numbers from Exeter--and beyond. Even during our toughest workouts, you always ran alongside giving us advice and encouraging us to do our best. Thank you for teaching me the importance of discipline and endurance. They are values that I cherish today. Mr. Parris would motivate me with very few words. The most powerful were, "She's one of my runners." I remember Mr. P as being a great motivator. Even though I was always at the back of the pack, he encouraged me to strive to run harder and lengthen my stride. Probably the most vivid memories involve "P" with his santa hat on and his red tights with his little skinny legs hopping around (usually because it was so cold) and loading us all into the van for a trip out somewhere in the NH countryside. His teaching us that our performance in the most difficult circumstances (at the bottom of that hill, in the driving rain) is what would separate the good from the great. Even in the math classroom Mr. Parris's encouragement affected me deeply. Like on the roads and trails, his positive way of teaching bolstered my confidence incredibly. Your graceful balance of mind, body, and spirit made you my most treasured life-long role model. He always ran right along side us, taking time to talk with each of us. When I was in college I decided I wanted to run a marathon, and asked P if he would train and run it with me. He did, and we ran 26.2 miles through Rhode Island--to keep me distracted, he taught me fractals. We will never forget the day that you told the team that if anyone ever bothered them, to turn to that person and with a straight face, look them directly in the eye and say, “You wanna race?” I'll always remember getting the "Chariots of Fire" truck stuck on the beach! I never considered myself a runner until that year. I will truly remember how great of a coach and friend you were. Thanks for being an awesome coach, friend, and teacher. I decided to run cross country my senior year after hearing stories for three years from happy Lamontsters about how great it was to have you as a coach. Everything they said was right. I got the sense that P's pedagogical approach was to try to instill a sense of confidence and optimism in the runners that would cause us to be the best that we could be even if we were not "the best" in the absolute sense. When I try to remember the details of my graduation day, the one I always think about is my interaction with you. I could not have done it without you. Your advice, over countless bowls of oatmeal, shaped me into the person I hope to be. But just as I was wondering how I was going to survive the season, P came over and gave me a couple encouraging words. I can’t even remember what he said--it was probably as simple as "You did well today"--but I remember thinking, "All right, maybe I can do this after all." The van rides with P were unforgettable. Even though I’ve always thought of P as being a sagacious man, he proved to be a big kid at heart. We’d blare music, the windows rolled down, thought we were cool! You know what, though? We were! Hill workouts have multiple benefits to for the cross country runner, but the one I remember is attached to the image of “P” explaining to us by exhibition and example, that hills build the ridge of muscle over the knee cap, and knowing which muscles to develop is key knowledge for runners. I could go on forever, but really I must simply say that I have never respected and admired anyone more than I do you. I wish you all the best and THANK YOU! The next morning Mr. Parris swooped into my math class, supposedly just to return my lost hat. But tucked inside the wool I found a signature-Mr. Parris tangerine. I am just glad I had the privilege to have you as my coach. The incident that really made me decide for sure to join the team was when you came to one of the swim meets. This proved to me that you genuinely care about each and every runner on the team. I remember swimming extremely well at that meet because I was so impressed. But my favorite image is the feel of your hand patting my back as you tell me that I did a good job after a huge hill workout or ten 400's on the track. For me, that is the ultimate accomplishment. What I found on your team was a sort of family, with you (of course) at the head: the gentle, encouraging father. I want you to know, P, you are what makes our team so remarkably happy and close. You’ve given us everything. Since I had the opportunity to have you as a math teacher, I got to see how you worked as a teacher and as a coach. I'm glad though, because it made me realize what a dedicated person you are to teaching and to the girls on the team. Thank you for the gentle confidence, dreams, goals, the pats on my shoulder, the oranges in PO, the right words of encouragement, perfect crisp fall runs, the push to run just one more Stratham hill or 400 around the track, the many many oatmeal mornings, and the constant reminders (never really heeded, but always appreciated!) to put some clothes on or at the very least a hat! Coming hard on the heels of a surrogate dad, you had a tough act to follow. But, through lemonade and bananas, Wednesday morning oatmeal, and the special P brand of smiles and pats on the back you made your mark as an incredible coach. Your constant encouragement and faith in us, as runners and people, is the best kind of training and coaching anyone could get. Every day I arrived at the Cage and knew that the workout you had designed would develop friendships among teammates while simultaneously preparing us for success at Interschols. When you get to the point where all the training you've done means something--the meets--then you realize why he forbade you from running one more 400, or why he made you run up all those hills. You're the best coach ever, and you well know we will never let you go!
PEA Girls' Cross Country page
Exeter Math Department's page about Mr. Parris
Mr. Parris's software page
Diana's Web Page